2/20/21: Sliccy’s

 I met Milanne & Dave S at some Irish place called “Legends,” in Willowsprings on Archer, no parking I ended up parking a block away at a “closed,” Hot Dog Restaurant; as you can imagine the Irish place was packed, no food was available there. I would say the real legend would be affordable prices at this joint. So we had a few pricey brews and left for Sliccy’s.

Sliccy’s was quite crowded as well, Chris (the owner) was glad to see us, why wouldn’t he be, we might leave a dollar tip. We each got a COVIID friendly fist bump from Chris welcoming us. I haven’t seen Milanne or Dave S since my Superbowl party. During the evening I danced with Milanne repeatedly, I asked Dave S, “why don’t you dance with Milanne?” to which he replied, “I’m waiting for a Polka, “I’m pure of heart, Have Rhythm in my blood and Beer In My Belly, another-words I’m ready to Polka!” “Besides Polka’s allow me to step on Milanne’s feet.” On Valentines Day Dave S took Millanne to a seafood joint. When he thought he ordered a Large Octopus for dinner from the waitress. What the waitress heard was “We’re from the band, would you please bring us our musical instruments.” So what the waitress brought out was a Scottish Bagpipe, A Octopus and a bagpipe look virtually the same, and octopuses are well known for changing color, even though plaid may be out of the normal wheelhouse of an Octopus. Most tall club members don’t really eat much Octopus, and then there was that stinky Marreties Octopus incident in Elgin years ago (quite humorous). Dave S did say he thought the skin was tough as well as the hideous noises emanating from the Bag Pipe, Octopus’s are normally quiet. Sometimes the Octopus squirts out ink while consuming one of these delectable creatures. I guess it’s what you would call, “an adventure in eating.” Also, nobody ever says, “can I have a bite to see if I like it.” Dave also got Milanne a bunch of flowers for Valentine’s day. “I found them in a sealed trash can behind the funeral pallor in Morris, fortunately, they weren’t frozen so I didn’t have to shove coat hanger wire up the stems and glue the petals on. If those flowers were frozen & dead I would’ve been in Dutch with Milanne.”

Milanne like me has Mini Glaciers evolving in her back yard as well as avalanches crashing down from her roof. When walking out the door the door then rubs against huge icicles which can hit you in the head, if one manages to fall down your back between your shirt and coat it’ll make a “believer out of you.” I did manage to tell a joke, when that happens Milanne holds her ears, I guess she’s becoming critical of some of my jokes. Then Dave repeats them to Milanne after she’s done holding her ears, after which Milanne inevitability says, “that’s the stupidous joke I ever heard.”

I told them they “missed a terrific opportunity to pick some cheap books at the Lockport Library Book Sale. I told her I bought some to make my bed, and couch higher. Milanne said, “you should try reading one of them.” To which I replied, “but that would make my couch wobbly.” Sometimes I actually get a little wobbly myself if I have been imbibing. Maybe the wobbly sofa and me being wobbly would cancel each other out, maybe I should read one of them.

Ace Reporter